Addiction: a trail of chaos & broken relationships
I don’t remember my first drink but I remember my last as I was driven terrified and anxious to begin treatment at Phoenix. It felt like my life was ending there and then, although in truth I scarcely had a life anymore just a trail of chaos and broken relationships. I’d tried everything I could to manage my drinking but each time I thought I had it beaten it came roaring back at me.
It was a corporate health check that really brought me to my senses when the full scale of the damage I was doing to my body was revealed. The Board gave me an ultimatum – go into treatment or get out.
It was HR that introduced me to Phoenix and, less than a week later, I was in a car heading from the airport to begin treatment. Once there, it took me a while to adjust. Not what I expected at all. No hand-wringing in a room full of sad and anxious people. No-one judging me. Just constant care and understanding from people who, for the first time in my life, seemed to really understand me. I began to relax and, as I worked through my programme, I began to understand my drinking and come to terms with its consequences. But most of all I began to start feeling hopeful again, to realise that a life without drinking wasn’t only possible but something I really wanted. And could achieve.
I can’t say enough how amazing it was to be away from day to day pressures and I came to particularly value my early mornings in the sunshine, enjoying the luxury of just living in the moment. Nearly a year later and I am still practising daily all that I learnt from Phoenix and check in with my counsellor regularly.